I got very frighten. I am afraid to live life. I am afraid to know what is going to happen. I am, really is. It was not a thing which I used to carry with me but this time round, it weigh quite heavily on me and its a feeling I cant stop. Tell me whats going on, what is it that is in me that made me become like this. Lost--------- You don't know whats is it, I don't either. What I just know bout this feeling is that I became very paranoid. Very paranoid of my loved ones. My mother, Father, Grandmother, Brother and Boyfriend. This few people, I get paranoid easily. When they don't pick up my calls, I kept calling. When they aren't feeling very well, I kept asking, I kept trying to find ways to recover them. I keep, I kept. I became someone who is very very extremely frighten that I'll lose my loved ones. Living Life for me became very...... vague. But, I was never at least like this despite them being my priorities. I seems to have lost myself entirely. lost, I don't know to whom, what, which, where, and how the hell did I lost it and why, Why did I even lose it. I got no idea.. Sigh. Wait, I know what, I lost my pet, a pet which I really liked and doted. A pet which allows me to become a pet lover, at least a dog lover. I cant say i'm a extreme dog lover but at least I finally understand what do owners mean by "dogs are man best friend" I finally understood.......... They are indeed lovable creatures. He created the bonds and polluted the house with their noises. It created laughter to the family and even when I'm not at home to accompany Grandma, at least I know he's there and he will.


(...) I still cry at the slightest thing esp when I see your pictures, esp when I see your pet shops, your treats, whatever. you know I still did. #Sweetheart. :'(


and wait again, I lost a friend, and another. I paid my last visit and the familiar images which were once alive became not, haunts me concurrently. It just kept coming back. and it scares me.


.
.
.

So all these make me to became like this right now, afraid, frighten, paranoid, bad dreams, it make a lot of sense and every each relates to my current situation.

Suck.

Tremendously.


:

I need to live life.


At least normally.

Has it been like a common practise to pay the last visit to your friend over in a box under the void deck?


Within the 2nd quarter of a year I visited 2. Tell me what is this, why is life so fragil. I thought I was recovering from the loss of a friend over a bike incident and then now again over another bike incident. It hurts. Nothing else but stunned, painful, and simply just lost. I dont know what to say. I lost my friend, again, over a bike accident. this friend is someone I'd closer contacts with. This friend was my colleague. This friend, we just went for drinking 2 weeks back and this friend, just commented on my status, calling me "Lian-perds" and this friend, was asking me to plan the other outing. This friend, whom I spoke several times with regards to his oversized bike, yet, taking every single care & concern for granted, this friend.... was a short term short lived friend yet, the happy images of this friend could keep coming back. This Friend, I will not remember the bloated body of yours in the box and finally this friend, I will never forget you despite having sucha short friendship with you. This Friend, I miss you.

My new scope started over at Changi South again... it seems that I cant get over with Changi South any time soon. Well, the new scope as well as the company is good. I like my cubical desk, errrr, my colleagues so far are alright , have been out lunching with random colleagues from varies departments. Well I think it did gave me some kinda mingle opportunities.

This is a 6 months temp contract but their paying are far better than normal ones.. hopefully after 6 months I can still stay there at least? hahaa:)

*****

And this is to the birthday girl below

Happy Twenty First Sista, please be happy:)


























xoxo. tampinesian rocks:)

It was Jerromes buddy Twentyfirst, was a house party plus a night at Helipad. Both were as good, it was not my first time hanging out with his buddies, well..... actually being the only girl also not bad. hahahaha. :)
















(K you know this group picture with the cake below? I dont understand why is the man/BOY screaming behind Jerrome doing this to our group picture. *&^%$#!~ he's not from the SP clique! I mean i'm not from SP either BUT I'm asked to be in the picture but it makes zero sense for him to be in it argh!!!)










Ok so its kinda obvious that Jerrome is quite happy to be in a club har?! He better not be addicted. *&^%$!~!

Random people and its happening






















































































Sometimes, you just dont know how people gets together, take nice pictures and erm, which probably would last for quite some time. xoxo.

Happy Twenty First Lynnette, goOdiesz since a decade or so.








































Hope you'd a blast;)

****************

I got a new job with its pay quite good and I freaking pass all my modules. diploma is freaking official MINE !!!!